Pentecost 23 – 2020
Matthew 15:1-13
Marian Free
In the name of God who nourishes and sustains us. Amen.
“Love your neighbour as yourself”, “the first shall be last and the last shall be first”, “take up your cross and follow me”, “forgive seventy times seven”. Jesus teaches and models selflessness, compassion, inclusion and understanding. The parable of the prepared and unprepared maidens seems to fly in the face of all of Jesus’ previous teaching and example – the door is shut and the bridegroom deaf to the pleas of the young girls who are locked outside. This is a parable that gratifies those who thirst for fairness and judgment (‘see we were right’ they can proclaim, “the bad and those who are not prepared will face judgement and be excluded from heaven!’). At the same time the parable appalls and confuses those of us who celebrate God’s inclusive, redeeming and all-embracing love. The shut door and the bridegroom’s refusal to acknowledge the young girls do not seem to fit with the Jesus who forgave those who nailed him to the cross.
There are a number of issues that are raised by this parable and unfortunately we do not know enough about first century wedding practices or the culture of the time to make proper sense of it. It appears that children were often betrothed at a very young age (Mary being an example). Often they were engaged to members of their extended family in order to strengthen and enhance family bonds. When the children (if they were children when betrothed) were old enough a wedding date was set. The fathers would meet to discuss the details of the arrangements – primarily the bride price or the dowry. The meeting would take place at the home of the bride and from there the groom would bring her to his home where the wedding feast would take place. (In a patrilineal society, the bride would become a part of her husband’s family.)
Our parable tells us that a number of young women have been sent to greet a bridegroom but for some reason he is not on his way. Despite the parables’ frequent appellation the girls are not bridesmaids for they have no relationship with or responsibility for the bride. In all probability they were young girls – the groom’s sisters or cousins. Their responsibility is unclear, but again, in the context of the parable it seems that their role was to provide light for the wedding party or at the very least to be a visible welcoming party.
We do not know if it was usual for negotiations to begin so late or to be so fraught that they do not conclude until nearly midnight. Presumably the girls had been sent on the assumption that the timing was right. There is no other reason why young girls (or unaccompanied girls of any age) would have been out on the streets at night. The expectation that it was the right time for the girls to be sent is reinforced by the fact that they had not all been sent off with extra oil. As time passes the girls drift off to sleep. (One wonders if the guests at the home of the bridegroom has also nodded off and what about the food – could it be kept warm enough, cool enough until the groom arrived?)
At last the groom is announced and five of the girls realise that they no longer have enough oil. The others refuse to share and send them to the dealers.one wonders if the girls have been sent out with money and if so, where would they find dealers who were still awake at midnight? Does the bridegroom bear no responsibility for keeping them out (and up) so late?
As it stands then, the parable includes a number of conundrums – but that is not the issue. This is a parable not an historic event. As much as we might want to understand the detail, the detail is not relevant to Jesus’ purpose or to our understanding.
Of those who were waiting for the bridegroom, ALL ten fell asleep. Alertness is not the issue, nor is the apparent selfishness of the wise or the irresponsibility of the groom. What does seem to be the point is having sufficient in reserve in order to respond whenever and wherever there is need.
For us, this means attending to our prayer lives and building our spiritual resources, allowing time for rest and recuperation so that we have reserves to fall back on and strengthening our relationship with God such that the difficulties of the present or of any future time will not find us depleted – unable to care for ourselves and certainly unable to sport or care for others.
COVID 19 has put us all to the test, putting strains on relationships, battering egos, changing lifestyles, depriving us of those things that give us a sense of worth and our lives some meaning, up-ending our expectations, limiting our activities and our contacts with friends and family and generally testing our resilience and our spiritual health. Elections in the United States and the changing balance of power on the world stage have added to our sense of disquiet and the feeling that we are not in control.
Today’s parable doesn’t insist that we spend our days in a state of constant alertness for Jesus’ return or that we busy ourselves trying to make sure that we have stores of goodwill built up with the Son to ensure we are not locked out of heaven. Rather it suggests that whatever storms rage around us, no matter how lost we may feel or how long the bridegroom is delayed, we will have built up our spiritual resilience such that we will be ready for anything and nothing will throw us off our stride. When the Son comes we won’t be scurrying off worried about one thing or another, but will be quietly and calmly present.
Swallowsrest 